The JOY

The Holidays are coming at rapid speed and I get to go home and see my family :) My loving husband has obtained a ticket for me to fly home and have my annual Holiday fun with my mom, sister and hopefully this year, my aunt sue. We explore little antique shops and have lunch....everything Merry :)I will be home for two weeks! I will of course miss my dear husband and our animals, but it will be nice to spend so much time with Sam. Her babies are not babies anymore yet they still love their Aunt Koe. I want to relish in this before they get too adolescent to give a crap about me. Now they still squeal and run at me with open arms....asking if I brought my phone (I have an Iphone full of game apps that they love). I am thankful at how close I am blessed to be with them. Its been amazing to be able to watch them grow from baby heaven breath to little yeahoos. My nephew especially blows me away since he was the first and I still kinda consider him the baby. He is such a smart little boy and has the sweetest heartbreaking eyes. He blows me away with his affinity for technology and ability to use it, to master it. He got my sister's humor (which she has always been a Ham...Sam the Ham)and is quite funny at times with his wit and observations. Liv is a beauty and I fear for Russ's sanity once she gets big enough for boyfriends. She will be the artsy one. She likes to draw, paint, and create. She loves to sing (beautifully i must add)and it draws a tear to my eye every time. She sang "you are so beautiful" to me the other day, and I tried to hold my self together. It doesn't matter what she sings, it always affects me the same weepy way. I don't listen to mainstream radio hits, but there is a Christina Aguillera song that has a chorus "you are beautiful no matter what they say"....and its one of her favorite songs to sing AND IT KILLS ME WHEN SHE SINGS IT. I do that inner dialog in my head every time she starts it. "Okay Nic, don't well up, its just a song she likes....don't listen to the words.....listen to how sweet and cute she sounds singing it.....gaaaaaaaaaa." Tears begging to be released. Now I get to wallow in their little snotty hands and little cold toes for two weeks and try to get control of my emotions so I'm not a slathering weepy Aunt Koe while I'm there. Note: slathering with complete love and envy.