Renewal

Im trying to focus on getting myself more...well,focused. I'm going through a detox of sorts and trying to manifest into the person I'd like to be. I watched the "Secret" on Netflix the other night and I've consciously been trying to bring goodness to my life. It is kind of crazy but I feel that it's working. Everyday when I my alarm gets off, I lie in bed for about 20 minutes or so just meditate on what I want to bring into my life. I can feel a shift,at least, inward. Jeff and I have been trying to be more active and I've been trying to control my emotional eating. I fought it at first because I definately have fears from my past with people in my life who are totally obsessed with outward appearances and I dont want that again. But there is a healthy balance at focusing on wellness and not going all narcasitic. Jeff tends to be a little compulsive about things, but I'm trying to tell myself that in the life there are a lot worse things he can focus his obsessive energy on. All in all its good for us. So I'm in a Springtime of my life. New green leaves pushing out of the hardened, packed ground. Soon, with the nuturing warmth of sunshine, I will bloom.

Watching the Secret

the law of attraction. this is a powerful. i am going to consciously try to attract the life I want and I believe this will work.

Louey

Remember when
we were little twins
holding each others hand

every day
we had someone to play
and share life's adventure

We've grown up now
but maybe somehow
there will be a time like that again

When you and I
have some time
to hold each others hand

suey lou

Yucky weather and home alone. I'm missing my sister today. Gonna let this inspire me and write a suey lou song. Love u sam. Im stealing your picture :)

burn

Imagine Peggy Lee's Fever swingy motion with this song--heavy bass line thump or Jeffrey put a kinda bluesy western swing

I don't know what to say to ya baby
my words don't come out right
There's something between us
that you
cant deny
We've spoken a thousand conversations
with only our eyes
Things are too complicated to
work out right

But Im blown by your beauty
Your eyes they burn through me
A fire
A fire
You make me alive
Desire
Inspire
me tonight

I want to get to know you baby
I want to be your friend
I wanna know how to get you to
show me that grin.
Things can get f'cked up too soon
when you move to fast
Gotta learn to pace myself
make something that lasts

But Im

Blown by your beauty
Your eyes they burn through me
A fire
A fire
you make me alive
Desire
Inspire
me tonight

As I'm developing in my song writing skills, Ive tried to get away from such personal story telling and going into situational character writing. Some of this song I wrote it seems 5-6 or more years ago and the rest I developed wanting to portray the intense speaking of words two strangers or acquaintances can have with just their eyes if there is a connection. It still needs a little more verse but this is what I have so far. When I wrote it it had more of a 50's swing vibe to it but Jeff composed this great hard almost westernly riff that I adapted the tempo really well to. We recorded it a couple time last year but we haven't gotten back into our little home studio since moving to Virginia.

Keep on

what you left smoldering I turned into flame
you dont have anyone but yourself to blame
I must say, myself,
I can not complain
You gave my soul it's mate by playin your games

So keep on dreamin
Its time to move on now
Keep on.....
Dreamin away
He's mine now
Somehow
You let him slip away
into my arms
everyday

Your head is ringin instead of your phone
Thoughts of your mistakes wont leave you alone
So have another drink
And lay yourself down
Cover your ears
but it wont block out the sound

So keep on dreamin
It's time to move on now
Keep on....
Dreamin away
He's mine now
Somehow
You let him slip away
into my arms
everyday

I wrote this a couple years ago and have been putting it together with my guitar playing. My chord changes are getting better, yet they still are rather slow. But perhaps I will post a video as I progress. I basically strum Em, D, C.

There was a time when I couldnt look at my face

From the troubles that I caused

and the mistakes that I made

Paint a mask, a foreign face

of my souls true taste

I was wrong, baby wrong

I was wrong

Black holds on

Black holds on

Black holds on

(Repeat one more time while strumming Em, then drop down two strings)

Bright white

Try as I might

to free myself

from this place

My gultiness

and the shadows of my disgrace

Purple hues, bleeding bruise

dont vanish

without a trace

We were wrong, baby wrong

we were wrong

Black holds on

Black holds on

Black holds on